I don't know why I torture myself, thinking this is going to be a hot & steamy post. Well I guess we can get naked, but there has been NO ACTION in this baby capsule for over 13weeks... I've been on Pelvic Rest since we got the news. Can you imagine? I know there are some women who couldn't care less about booty popping, but that's not the case for me! Even if I were allowed to, I don't know how it would be physically possible. I'm sooooo swollen down there that it would be like trying to fit a kids arm into those pool swim floaty things that go over their biceps to keep them from drowning. Not a good look.
Not to mention I can't even see what it looks like down near the Hotbox. For all I know I could have a troop of boy scouts camping out down there trying to earn some wilderness badges. Thank goodness for the Schick Electric Shaver that Brooke found me. It has a guard on it so I can blindly trim up the area without worry of cutting myself up. I do still have to trim up the sides with a regular razor to get a clean shave and that is quite the ordeal. It takes me 5mins per side. I have to kinda move my body so my belly adjusts to the opposite side, but I can't spread my legs far enough or else my wishbone will crack in half. All this... for what? Doctors don't care, nurses don't care, my hubs isn't getting any action so he doesn't care, I don't see it so why do I care? Maybe its just a vanity thing where I feel like I have my shit together if I'm edged up or something. Last thing I want is for someone to say during labor "O my gosh, here comes the baby and she has so much hair!! Wait... o no, that's not the baby. Never mind... she has no hair, that is not hair from the baby- I spoke too soon." After I get out of the shower I'm always excited to see my masterpiece, only to be disappointed. It looks the equivalent to someone giving Beebs some clippers and asking her to shave a dog. It's a mess and probably looks worse than before I started.
I used to always wax myself and then when that became impossible with Ava I went and had it done. I haven't this time around and with everything going on I never made time for it. So I guess we just have to suffer. I'm starting to get a few red stretch marks on my belly. At first I couldn't tell if they were from the Heparin Injections or what... but nope, they are stretch marks. I know someone reading this will think I'm vain for worrying about stretch marks, but I don't care. I don't want them. They are tremendously tough to get rid of and I don't want them!
Sometimes when Hubs and I are getting ready for bed I pretend to "strut" around like I'm about to give him a peep show or something. He stares at me until I get winded and have to sit down ask him to take my pants off or until I take my shirt and bra off and enough crumbs fall to the floor to feed a small village. It always ends up in us laughing and him telling me to get my pregnant ass in the bed lol. If we get cleared for "action" next week he said he still doesn't want to participate bc he's afraid it will stimulate something immediately. I agree, but I tell him that depending if I have a vagina birth again or a c-section it could be anywhere from 6-9weeks until we can really get our groove on. He started laughing, which at first just sounded like a silly laugh and then it was kinda creepy and then he followed it up with a high pitch squeal and said something like... ahhhhh... shit, owell. I don't think he expected that lol... when its all said and done it could damn near be half a year!
I also have this really attractive pubic type hair on my stomach. This happened with my pregnancy with Ava, but it showed up a lot faster this time around. I'm afraid to even really touch it with a razor in fear that it will grow back even more fierce. It really looks hideous and at times it pokes through my stretchy shirts. Even Beebs, not even 22 months old will lift up my shirt and point to the "hair" along with my protruding belly button that she has dubbed a "nose". My stomach is also splotched with yellow/blue bruises from the Heparin Injections. I guess I can't complain with those because most people get horrendous blue/purple bruises that cover their entire stomach.
My feet are also being neglected... I've always treated myself to 1-2 pedi's a month. Not so much now. I obviously can't really leave the house, there are pressure points that can stimulate labor and we've been strapped for cash. I am however, going to FINALLY cash in my Mother's Day gift from Hubs and get my Mani/Pedi next week sometime. He'll have to stay there with me, but owell. I am getting my feet rubbed for an hour whether it puts me in labor or not!!!!!
My boobs are getting bigger by the day & firmer. I can tell there is some milk starting to brew in there. Thank goodness I bought some really supportive nursing bras. I pretty much live in them now. However, I can't find my bra extender that adds a couple inches to the width across my back. I guess I"ll have to buy a new one! I'm curious to see what my belly will look like post two babies and even more curious to see how my hotbox holds up. If I tear I fully intend to ask one of my docs to stitch me up a few times on the inside while they're at it... They are getting paid enough for a little pro-bono work!
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